Monday Update: 6/16/14

Alright a bunch of whatever with little to no substance this week, sort of like... most weeks?

Mario Kart 8 (WiiU): Third Appearance, Third Straight Appearance
Well my sister left for camp for like the entire summer so looks like I have the Wii U and the family's one copy of Mario Kart 8 to myself FOR TWO MONTHS. Looks like I'm just gonna have fun being not all that good at Mario Kart.

I got fairly solid at 7, though never really "great" and I never figured out the Maka Wuhu trick. I was never particularly good at Mario Kart Wii, either, mostly because I never purchased it and instead rented it four weeks in a row from Blockbuster (It doesn't feel like that was too long ago, but hey, it was. Back in 2008 Blockbuster was really still the best option in terms of rentals compared to Netflix (whose streaming service hadn't totally taken off at that time) or Redbox (still relegated pretty much exclusively to McDonald's lobbies). Now, I haven't seen an open Blockbuster in over two years. It doesn't feel that long ago but hey, here we are.

I'm going to start trying online play later this week, so we'll see how that turns out.

Super Smash Bros. for Wii U and 3DS (Wii U/3DS) First Appearance
Oh, no, wait, no I didn't. I stood in line at Best Buy for 3 hours to be told that there wouldn't be enough time to get everyone through and then we had to leave. But I lost at Mario Kart 8 to some random kid and I did this:

also I had to work on Saturday so I couldn't ever make it to try it out. I'm gonna go ahead and say it's the best game I ever played and I've never seen anything more enjoyable in my whole life. Truly the most life-changing game I have ever tried, it will destroy all other forms of entertainment. Music? You have four months to come out with your final album, because the only thing that you'll need coming circa-October 2014 on 3DS and Q4 2014 on the Wii U will be Super Smash Bros. Movies? Stop making them. You're wasting your time. Theatre? Replaced by people playing Smash Bros. Hope you enjoyed the Super Bowl, we're never doing that again. Netflix? It's going the way of Blockbuster. Smash 4 is that good.

Castlevania (NES/GBA): First Appearance
I hadn't played Castlevania for the NES in probably about 15 years in all honesty, but I tried out the GBA port at Clay's house the other day and, unsurprisingly, I'm not good at it. Granted, Clay's Gamecube controller is fucked up, one of those third party controllers with the grips on the sides, and the A button is smashed in so it sometimes presses itself. I always preferred the later PS1 and Game Boy Advance style Castlevania games to the older ones.

Bram Stoker's Dracula (GB): First Appearance
Clay had me play this too. Imagine one of the most atmospheric horror movies turned into a Super Mario Bros. clone somehow.

Super Mario Land (GB): First Appearance
HEY! HEY! THIS GAME IS GOOD. PLEASE RECONSIDER ALL OF YOUR THINKPIECES WHERE YOU'RE LIKE "Hey actually Super Mario Land is bad because the turtles turn into bombs and the fire flower's different" AND JUST ENJOY IT PLEASE THANK YOU

NBA Live 2004 (XBOX): First Appearance
I'm considering an idea called "The Alternate Clay Bennett Timeline" in which the Sonics stay in Seattle due to a random number of coincidences and changes. It'll be like the Butterfly Effect mixed with the Mandela Effect mixed with AfterEffects and everything will be beautiful.

Thank you very much for reading the Monday Update, now go win some soccer games no matter who you are or what country you call home. Unless you're Belgium. I'll never forgive you for the Smurfs